A couple of weeks ago, I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. For some reason, likely poor planning on my part, I had several projects all coming due about the same time. Many of these were projects I could not delegate. At the time, I didn’t want to delegate anyways because my team already had a lot on their lists due to some changes in our curriculum. So, I just kept working at them. At one point, I stopped to reflect. I came to the realization that because of my intense focus on these projects over the last few weeks other aspects of my life and job were not receiving as much attention as they deserved: my team, my family, myself, and so on. I know that this is something we all experience at points during the year, which is why I thought to share this story.
You may know I am a Christian, and you may also know that I practice Zen philosophy, Chi Kung, and Tai Chi. A couple of you even know that I used to teach meditation, Chi Kung, and Tai Chi. I bring this up because as I was reflecting, I noticed two books on my shelf that I had not picked up in a while – Zen for Christians and Tai Chi as a Path of Wisdom. As I noticed these two texts, I sat there for a few minutes and reflected on some of the underlying principles that they, and my practice, teach. In this particular case, my thinking went to mental quietness, mindfulness, interconnectedness, and balance. I stress the word balance because that is what was missing from my work and life at that point in time.
Why is that? First, because I had so much going on, I had not allowed myself to quiet my mind. When I first get to work (or in this case walk up the stairs to my office) I would take a few minutes to just breathe and clear my head. I also did this at the end of each day. It helped me to maintain focus and perspective, leading to mindfulness. Mindfulness is being in the here and now. Don’t worry about yesterday or tomorrow, just focus on today – this very moment. In my teachings, I would have my students sit in a garden with their eyes closed and focus on what they felt, heard, smelled, etc. at any given moment. I would extend this exercise and encourage students to try and spend an entire day focusing only on the present moment. By doing so, we all realize how interconnected everything is, how each component of our work and our lives affect each other. This realization brings balance, our ability to understand that we must pause and give attention to each component of who we are (parent, sibling, child, leader, teacher, and so forth) in order for the other aspects of our lives to thrive.
You see, I had not been attentive to my practice and meditation, or simply put my self-care. As we all know, we can’t care for others if we do not care for ourselves. We have to balance in our work, taking time to care for ourselves, our families, our colleagues, etc. in sufficient amount that none of these experience dissatisfaction. We all need to take time in our lives for mental quietness, mindfulness, and interconnectedness if we want balance in our lives.